Friday, February 21, 2014

Dementia patients are not hiding or hoarding things, they forget where they belong

When someone living with Dementia believes something to be true, it is indeed true, in the world of Dementia...

You cannot change this. They cannot change this.

Are they safe?

Are they content?

Are they pain free?

If you can answer yes to these three simple questions, you have done the best you can do. Pick your battles. Chances are you won't win any of them.

"Mom hides or hoards things". We hear this all the time from caregivers. I suggest that they are putting things where they believe they go.

To consciously hide something, one would have to remember the item they want hid, where to hide it and to hide other things like that again.

You will hear they hide the bananas, or the bread. Perhaps their purse, or your purse. I think they are putting things away, where they believe they go.

We have found things in the fridge that belong in the cubbord. We have found screw drivers in the silverware drawer. Keys in the mailbox. Little things like this happen all the time.

I don't remember doing any of these things, but it not hard to figure out when you find a screwdriver in the silverware drawer who did it around here.

It's not that I am hiding anything. I am simply putting things away where I believe they go. Some may indeed be hiding things. But I contend most of the time they are simply putting their purse in the oven...cause that's where it goes.

Food for thought. From a patient who does these types of things all the time. And I know I'm not hiding anything.